Grass is Greener on the Other Side of the Universe
by cantstopthisinvasion
Summary: An underground operation, robot strip joints, a chain smoking scorponok, and Barricade falling in love with a human. What could go wrong?
1. Chapter 1

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**hello! This is an idea I cooked up about a week ago that I decided to write about. It does have quite a bit of violence and foul language, so be prepared. Tell me what you think, who should make an appearance, and if its good! Thats about all. **

**Oh, and no, I am not the original owner of any of the Transformers series, or concepts. Just so we're clear on that.  
**

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"So why did you run away?" 

Barricade shifted and moved the hand the human girl sat on up to his shoulder, to which she immediately changed places and settled on. He found he didn't quite know how to answer. The question wasn't unusual or unexpected, but difficult to answer all the same.

"I suppose I just felt that it was time." The words rasped out in a tongue foreign to him, that he was compelled to speak in by this odd human girl. Yet the words were true, seemed to be affirmed by speaking the language they deemed English.

"He would kill you if you returned." She stated; running a hand over the cool metal of his shoulder, unaffected by her placement.

"Yes." He found himself taken aback by the honesty of it. Why hadn't he defended his leader, why hadn't he silenced the human for saying something she knew nothing about? Because she did know something. Barricade felt the stirrings of something close to respect for her, and quickly repressed it. She wasn't anything special, not by his own or human standards. She was tall and willowy, with a thick mass of hair that fell past her waist the color of burnt gold, flashing green eyes set under brows just a bit too hooded to be pretty, and a nose that looked to have been broken. Physically, she was nothing. "You intrigue me," He found himself saying "You're odd for a human."

Her lips curved up in what they deemed a smile, though how the baring of teeth is a sign of pleasure was beyond him. She shifted on him, and draped her delicate human arm over his shoulder "I suppose I am odd aren't I?" She murmured, her voice becoming thick with the need to shut down her body and sleep. "Whats it like, to be like you?"

He tipped his head to the side and flexed a hand, he hadn't really thought about that "I don't know, exactly. But something similar to being you."

Her head drooped and he felt her body slowing, it alarmed him. He shifted again to wake her up, and felt the presence of another of his kind behind him. He tensed and picked up the human girl, set her down on the ground and turned to face what he knew to be another decepticon.

"Barricade," Blackout spoke his name in their native language "It's time to return."

The sound rang in his head, he didn't want to leave. "No." He said, and from the look on Blackout's face he realized he had said it in English. "No." He said it again in his own language.

"I don't think you understand," Blackout said, optics flashing as he tensed for a fight "That wasn't a request."

Barricade shifted slightly to shield the human should Blackout strike "I understood you just fine, I'm not going back."

Blackout saw Barricades movement and looked down only to catch a glimpse of a malnourished little human girl, and looked away quickly to hide that he had seen her. She was a part of the UCO project, and must be left alive. "Well then," Blackout said, shifting forms as he did "I guess I have no choice but to terminate you."

* * *

It had been three days since her encounter with Barricade. Three days for her to think about meeting an alien robot who had apparently not only gone A.W.O.L, but had given top secret information to some other group of alien robots called the Autobots and was now a dead man -um, robot- walking. To top that off, she was actually worried about him (Can robots be hims?) He had been dragged off by some other robot with helicopter blades and looked badly injured. She was _so_ going crazy. 

A knock on the door threw her off her thought train (Which was fortunate, she was almost completely certain it would have resulted in a crash) and she padded downstairs to the front to answer it.

"Yeah?" She said swinging open the door with a bit more force than necessary. Okay, that was rude, but she wasn't in the mood today.

"Hey Katie," The visitor grinned, putting out their cigarette on the door frame "ready for our road trip?"

"Oh shit Scorponok, I completely forgot. I'm not packed or anything." She looked at him apologetically.

He sighed and pushed his spiky black hair out of his face "Its fine. Can I come in? I'll help you pack." Before she had time to reply he had pushed by her and was already bounding up the stairs to her room.

Katie smiled. That was Scorp, pushy as ever. She had only met him about a month ago, but they had become friends quick. So what if he did things or said things that were a little off now and then? He was cool. And he pissed her mom off. _Major _bonus. The minute her mother had seen the 6 feet of tattoos and piercings standing on the porch clad in leather pants and matching jacket, she had forbid her ever to hang out with him. Naturally, she did anyway. Katie took the stairs two at the time to find Scorponok kicking off his spiked combat boots and taking a long drag on a new cigarette.

He sat up and blew the smoke in her face "What took you so long?"

She coughed and waved a hand to clear the smoke "Nothing I was just thinking," She coughed again "Ugh, damn it, will you put that stupid thing out?"

Scorponok smiled to reveal metal tipped teeth in sharp shark-like rows and put out the cigarette on his tongue. Katie stared at him.

"You're really freaky sometimes, you know that?" She reached into her closet for her suitcase and instead of grabbing the handle like she normally would, only got air. "Scorp, wheres my suitcase?"

He waved in the direction of her bedroom door as he pulled his boots back on "I already packed for you."

"Oh," She had long since stopped wondering how he could get things done so fast and walked over to peek inside, just to make sure. Everything seemed in order. "Guess I'm already packed then. Where are we going anyway?"

He picked up her bag for her and ran his pierced tongue over his teeth "You'll see."

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"You dare defy Lord Megatron?" Starscream almost cackled with glee, ripping off another piece of Barricades armor and cutting through circuitry. Barricade staggered, but stayed upright and snarled at his former comrade 

"Lord? The only thing Megatron is _lord_ of is the scrapheap, you bulb headed freak."

Starscream bared his teeth at him and lunged forward only to be stopped cold by a voice he knew all too well.

"Stop Starscream. I need him alive, we'll be having visitors soon."

Starscream muttered a curse to himself but backed down "Yes Lord Megatron, I shall prepare immediately for our spies return," Starscream made sure to keep his voice steady so not to betray his utter loathing of him "But where shall we store the human girl accompanying him?"

"I don't care Starscream, after we take the chip from her shes dead anyway. Find someplace."

Starscream glared once more at Barricade, the noble bastard, before turning back to Megatron "Yes my lord, right away." And he was off.

Megatron turned to stare at Barricade "Blackout has informed me that you made contact with a human female three suns ago," He paused to study the look in Barricades optics "I'll be sure to put on quite a show for you, when we kill her."

Barricades head snapped up "Never."

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**Well...that'd be it for the first chapter. What do you think?? R&R please, it is so very much appreciated. **

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	2. Chapter 2

* * *

**hello! This is an idea I cooked up about a week ago that I decided to write about. It does have quite a bit of violence and foul language, so be prepared. Tell me what you think, who should make an appearance, and if its good! Thats about all. **

**Oh, and no, I am not the original owner of any of the Transformers series, or concepts. Just so we're clear on that.**

* * *

"We have a flat! A fucking flat tire!" Scorponok kicked the side of his very expensive and usually well equipped car. 

Katie sighed and leaned back against the hood "Well, this is what you get for going 108 and not watching the road."

Scorponok growled and lit another cigarette, muttering something under his breath Katie couldn't quite make out but she imagined it involved her and she was too stressed out for that.

She knocked the cigarette out of his hand "are you _trying_ to send yourself into an early grave, as a matter of fact are you trying to put _me_ there? That one marks the hundredth cancer stick you've popped in your mouth since we started driving two hours ago!" She stomped it out, "Thats like a cigarette every fucking minute! Where do you keep pulling them out of? I'd like a moment of fresh air to think about how we're getting out of this!" She snapped, motioning to the tire that was beyond repair.

Scorponok gave her a look that would scorch a normal person on the spot. She, however, was not as intimidated.

He growled "Fine, you know what, I'll go smoke over there," He motioned to a pasture on their left "And while I'm at it, I'll call us a tow truck so your _Highness_ doesn't have to sit on the side of the road for the rest of the day." He hissed at her.

"Fine!" She crossed her arms and sat back on the hood.

"Fine!" Scorponok walked over to the grassy pasture pulling out yet another smoke as he did. Screw her.

Katie flinched and bit her lip when he walked off. She hadn't meant to make him that angry, she was just stressed out and tired of breathing in that damnable nuclear fog that he emits every second of the day. Katie rolled her eyes when she saw him taking a drag on another one, calling their tow truck. Wait a minute, Katie looked again, did his eyes just flash _red_? No. No way. Trick of the light. She swallowed nervously and looked up to the sky where rain clouds were gathering. _What light_? She shivered. This trip was going bad, fast.

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One of the worst parts of dealing with humans was their tendency to overreact. It was one of their qualities that made them less than endearing to him. Scorponok quickly pulled out the phone he had been issued by his teammate and hit speed dial as he lit up again. They answered on the second ring. Unfortunately, it was not who he wanted to hear from at the moment. 

"Yes?" Devastator barked out at him from the other end of the line.

"Ah, Devastator my old friend, thank you for asking how the trip is going. Lovely, just lovely. And how are you?" Scorponok said dryly, blowing out smoke.

A growl rumbled over the phone "Cut the shit Scorpnok, I don't want to hear it. You know this is an emergency line, why are you calling?"

His lips twitched up into a grin, "Because I love hearing your voice?"

Silence.

Scorponok paused, took another drag and flicked it to the ground. "Theres a problem with the delivery."

"What do you mean, a problem with the delivery?" Devastator growled. There was a shuffling sound and Scorponok heard other voices in the background "Hold on, I'm passing you over to Bonecrusher."

Great. Bonecrusher. Only a link down from Devastator, the both of them were missing some critical wiring and acted as the equivalent of the human movie _Iron Giant_ without the urge to do good. Or the logic.

"Little One, what have you done wrong now?" Scorponok could hear the sneer in Bonecrusher's voice.

"Nothing really, probably just botched your entire operation, thats all." He said calmly, toeing the crushed remains of his cigarette with his boot.

"Foolish sparkling, you'll die if you have." Bonecrusher spat.

"Ah, well then I guess it's a good thing it's only a flat tire, isn't it?"

Dry rusty laughter traveled over the phone "A flat tire, that is all? Foolish sparkling. We will send an escort immediately."

"Wait, whoa, who am I getting?" He asked, but the line had already gone dead. Scorponok's eyes flashed briefly, revealing their true color. He truly loathed them.

* * *

"What took you so long?" Katie asked, crossing her arms over her chest in response to the cold that was setting in. 

"Tow Service didn't answer," He lied "I called a friend to come pick us up."

"Well, they better get here soon, it looks like the storms gonna be pretty bad."

"Yeah."

There was silence between them, and Scorponok caught Katie staring at him out of the corner of his eye "Why are you looking at me like that?"

She didn't answer, instead she was suddenly interested in the dead bugs on the windshield.

"Well?"

"Your eyes." She blurted out suddenly, still staring at the windshield "I thought I saw you with red eyes."

Scorponok cracked a grin at that "Did you now? Well then, if thats all." He held open the passenger door for her as the first drop hit the ground.

* * *

"An Escort you say?" Megatron glanced distractedly over at Bonecrusher and Devastator "Very well then, send one." 

"Yes Lord," they chorused as one "But who?"

"Why, Barricade of course, who else would I send?"

"But--"

"You question me?" He snapped at them.

"No Lord. Never." They both bowed until their heads hit the floor

"Good, then make the necessary adjustments and send him on his way. I trust you both know the coordinates." He flicked his hand in dismissal.

"Of course Lord, immediately." One more ground scraping bow and the pair went on their way.

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**Ooh, will Katie recognize her robot knight? Find out, in the next chapter! R&R please, it is so very much appreciated. **

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End file.
